Thursday, January 31, 2008

Your gone for 2 days, and all heck breaks loose!

Since writing on my blog monday,  I can't believe how much stuff we need to catch up on (all 5 of us,  still waiting for Kathy)!  Yesterday was a huge day of events.  First off,  I read on line that Tyra (she should drop her last name,  and just be known by a single name you know like Cher or Celine) is going to develop a new reality show,  and the winner will land a fashion magazine contract,  to work at the magazine.  Now that's a show I WILL audition for!  I have fashion sense (o.k. their was the one time when I was at orientation for college,  and I wore vertical striped shorts with a horizontal shirt,  but other than that,  I've been on track).  I know not to wear white after labor day (t-shirts are o.k.) and not to wear white socks with dress shoes and dress pants (come on,  the Michael Jackson look with white socks and slacks is over!  Move along to the dress socks department)!  I will have to find out,  how to apply for the show.  Also yesterday,  I see that their going to make new versions of both Freddy Krueger,  and Friday the 29th,  I mean the 13th (Its been so long going.  When will Jason finally be able to rest in the lake in peace?) movies.  Of course being the horror/slasher movie fan that I am  (more like sucker),  I will go see both.  Then I'll go home from the movie,  and be in the bathroom getting ready for bed,  and fling the shower curtain open because I think they will both be waiting for me (although I do have a clear see through shower curtain.  Could you pass me my toothbrush?  Thanks Jason!) I can't believe that movies like that STILL make me scared after the fact.

Yesterday also saw 2 of our presidential hopefuls drop out of the race.  John Edwards (not bad looking.  He'd be good for a one nighter!) and Rudy Giuliani (he can finally go back to doing his drag routine in vegas at the freemont street theatre!)  Now we only have McCain (sounds like a bad sandwich named by McDonald's),  Romney,  Huckabee (I did see the movie,  not bad!),  Hilary,  and Obama.  I thought of this bumper sticker just this morning for Obama.  "Tell your mama,  to vote for Obama!"  Not bad (duh!)  And the race goes on.......

Last night was the big night,  The Blue Man Group concert.  It was very entertaining!  The "men" had a warm up act and his name was Mike Relm.  He was from San Fransisco (so gay),  and he used a combination of d.j. style mixing of scratching records,  and mixing it with images on a big t.v. screen.  25 minutes later (thank god!) he was done,  and the "men" came on the stage.  They put on a great show!  I was kinda hoping to see some nudity,  but no such luck!  Maybe that's a vegas thing!  Anyway,  they played music on huge drum barrels with multi colored light coming out of each one.  They had skits,  audience participation, ( blah,  blah,  blah).  I would love to see them again,  but in vegas.  They did say they were giving away a trip for 4 to see them in vegas at the venetian,  If you went to their website,  and subscribed to their newsletter. (you think Im going to give you the website,  so my chances are even slimmer of winning?  NO Way!  o.k. If you want it,  let me know,  and I'll give it to you!)

I also read on yahoo this morning about a little girl who's 10 years old,  earning a degree in vetarinary medicine.  I can't tie my shoes some mornings,  but she earned a degree!  Mind you,  If you take your pet to her,  make sure she knows your pet is a REAL dog or cat.  One slight distraction and she will not be paying attention to what she's doing!  "Look,  its britney going to the hospital,  for her mental illness!"  All of a sudden,  the needle slips out of her hands,  and lands on your pet where it shouldn't have!  Poor fluffy!

Finally,  the list of top "Cash Queens of Music"  were announced.  MADONNA was #1 (hooray!) followed by "babs" Barbara S.  Then Saline,  I mean Celine was 3rd.  Shakira (hoochie) was 4th. Beyonce was 5th,  Gwen Stephani (who's expecting her second child.  That trailer park is becoming a reality even faster) was 6th.  Christina A. was 7th,  followed by Faith Hill at 8th (Tim the hubby,  is so yummy!  Somebody stop me!  NO REALLY!) The Dixie Chicks were 9th,  and finally Mariah Carey was 10th (finally,  she cracked into the top 10 of some list!)  Britney ranked 14th (maybe it wasn't a good year for brit?  Just a feeling Im getting!)

That's all I have for this blog (thank god!  It was the longest I've ever written)!  Happy Kathy Griffin thursday!  I will be back on saturday with an update on the tryouts from monday,  and what part I received,  and also whether or not miss Kathy finally responds (I think we all know how that shapes up already)!  Have a good one!  and as Tim Gunn would say "Carry ON"! 

Tuesday, January 29, 2008

Its Tuesday already! The week's almost over ( o.k. not really!)

Well,  another weekend has come and gone.  The funny thing is,  I never really do anything fun (yeah,  serving pancakes is a blast!  LOL).  Friday evening,  I caught up on some t.v. I recorded from the previous week.  Celebrity apprentice was the normal boardroom antics (your fired!  I always wanted to say that!) with some olympic softball girl named jenny getting the axe (not literally)!  I also watched project runway.  This episode the designers had to make a garment out of levi's jeans and jackets (the company provided the materials for the challenge,  it wasn't some poor sap named "levi").  Some designs were good.  Others,  you get the idea!  Saturday evening I came home from work early (hooray!) and was flipping through the channels,  and flipping,  and flipping.  About 10 minutes had gone by.  How can nothing be on over 300 channels,  and on a saturday night (its unheard of)!  I finally watched of all movies "Texas chainsaw massacre,  the beginning".  It was the newer version from 2006.  I can' believe that story ACTUALLY happened!  They said so on a tag at the end of the movie!   This family killed 33 people from 79'-83'.  Holy cow!  Where are all the sheriff's and police?  How bout' the military? And don't tell me they were all busy taking a coffee/donut break (o.k. maybe they were,  just don't tell me!  Don't get me started.  Don't even get me started)!  movin' on.......

On sunday,  I finally got the answer to my burning question "did I get a part in the new equinox theatre production"?  HECK NO!  First off,  the director had told all of us that he would call us either way by friday,  since there were so few of us who turned out for the audition.  Friday came,  no call.  Saturday came,  no call.  Finally,  on sunday he sent me an e-mail,  saying he was trying to "lock down" the cast (go to your room!  no dessert for you!) and that's what had taken so long.  Maybe he should "lock down"  a finger on a keypad on a phone or a computer BEFORE sunday.  I mean,  really people!  If your going to promise something,  you should follow through.  At least TRY and follow through.  Look at Britney, ( a prime example).  I read on line yesterday that britney is ACTUALLY good for the u.s. economy.  She brings in $120 million per year (and she doesn't even have to lie on her back for it!  You go girl!)  who would have thought our little britney could be good for us ( I never saw that coming,  honest!)  Since I didn't get a part with the equinox theatre,  I auditioned last night for the firehouse 5 and The Music Man.
I will know by friday @ 5:00 p.m.  and they know how to keep a promise!

I'f any of you (all 5 readers,  still waiting for Kathy!  Love you Kathy!) like paula abdul,  and like randy jackson from american idol,  then you should go to i-tunes and play their new song.  Its danceable like we know paula to be!  I think you'll get the song in the 30 seconds you listen to it,  rather than buying the entire song for .99 cents.  Im still wondering If both of them are going to be singing the song at the super bowl?  We shall see.  

Finally,  I want to send a shout out to my friend Larry S.  who passed away last week.  I went to the memorial service yesterday,  and it was very touching and moving.  I have known larry for 8-9 years now,  and I learned some things about larry yesterday at the service I didn't know about him.  He was very artistic.  He brought a lot of humor and wit to everything in life and I will truly miss him!  Larry,  If you can have access to a computer in heaven,  please read this,  and know that my blog will forever be here for you to laugh at,  and I hope that one day,  when we meet again,  we'll be able to pick up our friendship were we left it off!  See you all on thursday with a blue man group review (yes,  Im going!)  and Kathy thursday!  Take care and stay warm and safe!  

Friday, January 25, 2008

I missed a day of blogging! Don't worry, I am here to catch you up!

O.K. I know I missed like 2 days worth of blog writing on here.  I was going to write my blog,  as usual yesterday,  but I wasn't feeling all that great.  I think it was something I ate the night before at work (don't let that confession detour you all from eating at the restaurant!) but now Im back! I just got a phone call on my cell,  from what is probably a collection agency,  looking for a Francis James.  Francis,  If you read this (highly unlikely),  please call Christa!  That way,  she ISN'T calling my cell number,  looking for you!  Thanks.  That would be great!  O.K. where was I? Ooh yes,  yesterday.  I wasn't feeling all that great,  so I decided to catch up on some of the shows I've recorded (apparently using the word "taping" is out.  Who knew!) from previous weeks,  that I hadn't watched yet.  I caught up on The Celebrity Apprentice (all 3 episodes to date).  Most of the celebrity's I have heard of.  A few I haven't.  Like,  for example some former playboy playmate named "Tiffany" (her real name or an alias,  who knows.)  The Donald fired her,  because during a team challenge,  she didn't call Mr. Hefner,  to get him to buy a hotdog for $1,000,000.  That better be one tasty dog!  Gene Simmons,  of kiss fame was fired last week.  I need to watch last night's episode (obviously),  to see who was kicked off.  Omarosa,  Is on this celebrity apprentice.  I remember when she was on The Surreal Life,  with Janice Dickenson and Omarosa pulled a butcher knife on Janice,  during a cast photo shoot.  The Bitch is crazy!  Moving on.  I haven't seen any of the American Idol auditions,  but I plan on watching tonight,  and will give you all (up to 5 reader's now),  an update!

Well,  even though I wasn't feeling good yesterday,  I still was able to go and see SWEENEY last night!  Ooh my god!  It was so good!  Can you tell how good it was!  Im using exclamat!ons way too much in my sentence!  Johnny was everything I hoped he'd be.  The movie was just amazing.  I plan on buying the d.v.d when it comes out (and I never buy d.v.d.'s!  O.K. I did buy the departed,  but that was a gift for mike for christmas,  so it doesn't count!)  He sang amazing,  the costumes,  the set,  the blood,  I mean it was just incredible.  I know he's nominated for best actor,  but I think he may have some competition,  what with Daniel Day Lewis,  and Viggio (and that naked sauna scene-yummers!) up against him also.  I looked at the list this morning before writing this blog,  and I have never heard of any of the best actress nominated movies,  expect Juno,  and the actress who plays her.  O.K. there is Laura Linney,  for her role about her dad,  and Kate Blanchett for her version of the queen (been there,  done that!) but there really isn't any one actress,  or film that they're in,  that stands out.  We shall see (hopefully),  who wins on feb. 25th.  I know most of you have heard that Heath Ledger died on tuesday.  I think we are all saddened at what has happened.  I just wanted to mention it,  and say how sad it is,  that we lost such a talented man.  

Well,  Im off to send this to Kathy,  with an apology for not sending it yesterday,  on Kathy G thursday ( I came up with that!) and I will let her know that I wasn't feeling well.  Maybe she'll send me an e-card,  and tell me she'd love to meet me (yeah,  right!) as soon as she has some free time!  Until next time,  I will see you on monday ( I need some material.) morning!  Take care and have a great weekend! 

Tuesday, January 22, 2008

Still freezing (both here in montana and in hollywood!)

O.K. I have my first retraction (and hopefully my last)!  Yesterday I mentioned that joel madden and nicole richie named their daughter winter.  Turns out that's her middle name.  Her first name is Harlow winter.  Whatever!  Maybe nicole should read a baby name book (or have someone read it to her,  and have common names read aloud.  Not names like paprika or black pepper) next time (Yikes!) she has her next child.  Thanks to my faithful reader buckycatt for the correction!  Now onto my audition last evening at the equinox theatre.  When I got there,  my friend debbie was already there,  as well as 2 other men.  I filled out my audition form,  picked up the copy of the script to read from (nicely marked I may ad!) sat and began to prepare.  About 15 minutes later,  who walks in to audition,  but miss Alexis (lap dance anyone)?  She walks in and says "How long do you think it will take?  I brought my dog,  and she's in my car but I left the car running so she'll stay warm."  WHAT!  O.K. its like -15 below,  and she brings her dog to an audition in the freezing cold!  Bad owner-Bad owner!  I told her that the director is taking people one by one,  according to where their name is on the sign in sheet (I was 3rd).  At this point about 6 of us were waiting to audition when Alexis stands up and says in her out loud voice " its too quiet out here (lobby of theatre),  how come no one is talking with each other?"  Hmmm.....Im going to go out on a limb here and say BECAUSE WERE ALL TRYING TO PREPARE FOR THE AUDITION!  Then she proceeds to sit in front of me on the floor to visit with me.  She then says  "I think I'll come back in 30 minutes.  I want to run to the store while Im waiting,  and go by myself some cake,  then I'll eat it while I wait."
Honey,  don't you know the first rule of auditioning?  You stop at the store AFTER your audition,  and buy junk food to ease the pain of how awful you read!  (Or to celebrate how great you did)!  I think I read really well.  Im proud of how I did,  and I'll find out on friday either way
(as well as all of you!  It could be good or bad.  Let's find out together shall we!)  

Now onto the Oscar Nominations.  I read most of them this morning on line.  It looks like the frontrunners are no country for old men  (8 total)  atonement,  although keira knightly was snubbed for best actress,  and so was the director (poor keira),  george clooney for nominated for his lawyer movie (drawing a blank at the moment).  I was surprised (and I mean surprised) when I read that Viggio was nominated for eastern promises ( that steam room scene with him naked and you seeing his junk and all.  Now that's the clip they should show during the awards show)!  And yes,  Johnny was nominated for sweeney.  Although tim burton wasn't for direction.  I will run down the entire nominee list tomorrow (and probably have to correct yet again more retractions due to my mistakes in what I read about the nominees!  OOPS)!  I need to go make sure my car starts,  I will see all tomorrow (or thursday).  Stay warm!

Monday, January 21, 2008

Its SO cold! How cold is it? I can't feel my fingers while typing this blog!

Happy monday to all!  O.K. there's never REALLY anything happy about mondays other than maybe an occasional payday (highly unlikely),  but I figured it was worth a shot!  I can't wait to see sweeney todd on thursday!  I hope Im not going to get all excited about the  movie,  and then go and see it,  then be disappointed!  I hate that.  Johnny has never let me down in anything he does.  And tomorrow is even a bigger day (bigger than sweeney or kathy) because the Oscar nominations will be announced.  And who do you think will be discussing it on here?  ME! (duh).

There wasn't really much of anything happening over this past weekend.  Well,  o.k. Christina Agu (I can't spell her last name,  so that's how IM going to spell it!) had a baby boy!  Congrats Christina.  I also heard that nicole richie named her son "winter".  I have two words to that PA LEEZ!  I know that nicole can't read even a simple comic strip,  but to name your son after a season.  I thought her fiancee' was even smarter than that!  Unless HE picked out the name?  I guess well never know,  until the kid spills his guts on "extra" when he's 18 or something.

"Cloverfield" was # 1 at the box office over the weekend.  I DO want to see it,  If anything for all the hype its been getting.  That's what I said about "snakes on a plane",  and the snakes looked so fake!  We all shall see what the movie had to offer after IM done with it (can't wait for that.  somebody hold him back!)

I am going to the Equinox theatre tonight to audition for their upcoming comedy "how I learned to drive".  They only have 2 parts for 2 males (obviously),  and 1 female part.  I should go for the female part!  LOL (no seriously!)  I will let you know how the audition goes tomorrow.  I think they pre cast their actors,  but we'll see.  I would be shocked (yes shocked),  If I WAS cast for a role!  But I'll just pay the director off for the part,  and IM in!  That's all I pretty much have for this edition.  I will have much more tomorrow (oscars,  auditions,  etc.)  Hope everybody stays warm!  I know I will (I have a blankie!)  See you all tomorrow!  


Friday, January 18, 2008

So many stories to cover, where do I begin? (Try the beginning!) Good idea!

Friday is finally here!  Sweeney Todd is finally here!  I,  of course am waiting until next wednesday to see the movie with my friend becky (who by the way FINALLY was able to log onto my blogspot!  You go girl! *snap*!) only because she told me that If I didn't wait for her to see the movie,  she was going to fulfill my comment out in real time,  and actually become sweeney's twin sister,  and cut me with a shaving blade (yeah,  I think I'll wait for her.  My face is too pretty to be used as an example of what happens when you DON'T listen!) I've waited this long,  I can wait another 5 days (torture!) but enough about sweeney (gasp) moving on to other matters at hand.

So yesterday,   I e-mailed Kathy Griffin (yet again!)  about my blogspot page.  I told her she should mention it in her act while she was performing in front of the audience (yeah right!) I was surprised when I read the list of winners,  who won tickets to see kathy in New York at Madison Square Garden on January 29th.  My name WASN'T on the list of winners who had won tickets (I know,  I was just as shocked as all of you are right now reading this!)   I mean,  I thought I had a good chance,  what with the obsessive e-mails to her website on a weekly to bi-weekly basis!  Ooh well,  that just means I'll be meeting my idol in person someday (like in a court room setting with me as the defendant!) I did notice she's playing in Reno, Nv in May sometime (road trip!) Anyone interested in going to Reno in May to see Kathy,  let me know!

I was so busy bashing georgie Michael's book deal yesterday (remember $7.00 in the bargain bin @ Border's!) that I forgot to mention Oprah's new t.v. channel (o.k. mentioned it,  moving on!  LOL) deal.  For those of you who have been in an internet coma (highly doubtful) Oprah is going to have her very own t.v. channel called OWN (Oprah Winfrey Network.  Try and keep up people!)  I was trying to spell out the letters a different way,  when I first saw the station letter's on line.  Like Our Winfrey Now!  Or Ooh Winfrey Now?  You get the idea.  Not that I have anything against Oprah (all her money and power),  but do we really need an actual t.v. channel with Oprah 24/7?  She already has the market on everything else!  What's next?  She buys an entire country and decides to run it?  OOH wait,  she already started that idea with Obama!  I haven't decided who to vote for in the upcoming presidential election.  Maybe I'll 
hand write in my candidate,  like sponge bob square pants (go sponge bob!) Bob 4 PREZ!

Finally,  I read on line just this morning that Lindsey Lohan has been sentenced to do 4 hours a week of community service in a mortuary.  Those poor dead people!  Can you imagine what that's going to be like for those who no longer are able to live (although there COULD be some miracles happening once she walks into the room,  and all of a sudden,  they see lindsey.  Talk about waking up the dead!) She shouldn't be helping with hair and make up, "why does margaret look like a $5.00 hooker?"  And she shouldn't be helping with embalming "how do you turn this thing on?  Is it like a vacuum?".  Why don't they have Lindsey doing what she does best,  picking up trash and putting it in  a garbage bag without any feeling or remorse!  (She should start with her last 2 movies!)  That's all I have for observation for this friday.  Hope you all like the new format layout.  I'll be back on monday to recap the weekend!  (ooh goodey!) 

Thursday, January 17, 2008

Only 1 more day, and SWEENEY shall be here!!!

As some of you who read this blog (all 3.  Thanks again.  I would love to send you a gift just for reading this blog on a regular basis,  but I only have my words which should be gift enough!) sweeney todd will be here tomorrow.  Although I would love to go on opening night (I even bought white hair color to give myself that skunk look that johnny has.  Guess I'll save it for halloween and go as the barber!)  I am waiting to go with my friend becky (besides she WOULD become the demon barber of fleet street,  had I not waited for her to see the movie.  Put the shaving blade down slowly!) I will wait until next week when we can go together and see johnny slice up his victims,  while singing about it (sorta like j-lo's last album and movie!)

Now that Desperate Housewives will not be back until 2010,  I noticed on the t.v. schedule line up,  that ugly betty is pumping out new episodes this week and next.  At least we'll have betty for awhile,  until they air the last episode written before the strike,  then betty will be back until 2011.  I read they may cancel the grammy awards show because of the strike (finally,  the 1 show they NEED to cancel!  Come on,  who really wants to sit there for 3 hours and watch performances by the nominees,  and then be teased with a "coming up,  album of the year" 15 times during the show,  then finding out who won 30 minutes after the grammy's were supposed to be over!  Just tell us who won the stinking statue,  and let's move on!)  

Last night while watching t.v .(or lack of)  I saw this stupid commercial for walmart (like all the other commercials they've had were brilliant!)  Like the commercial they played over and over this past holiday season with the kid leaving a "hint" poster of the dvd's he (or she) wanted all over the house,  so mom and dad would see them but not right away.  Mom and dad would be getting out of the car,  and there would be a gigantic "hint" poster of the movie they wanted on the garage door,  or on the shower wall,  even on the ceiling of mom and dad's bedroom!  I don't know about you,  but I was never allowed to go into my parent's bedroom,  let alone wanting to.  It's kinda creepy to think these kids went THAT far to plaster a movie poster on the ceiling of their parents bedroom!  Hmmm....they make these things called paper and pen!  Anyway now walmart has yet another classic (not) commercial for the "big game" day.  It shows these housewives in their favorite football team attire,  preparing snacks for the game,  and then showing the woman running through a line up to her livingroom,  high fiving her guests to tell them her snacks(which she DIDN'T even slave over all day to make.  Yeah,  its really hard to open a box of wheat thins and dump into a bowl!) are ready for the "big game".  Gimme a break!  Get a life (myself included!)  No one cares where they buy their game food,  as long as they have it when their team is winning,  so they can celebrate with a chip and dip(literally!)

Finally,  I read this morning on line,  that George Michael has signed a $7 million dollar book deal with harper book publishing,  to write his autobiography (you ACTUALLY have to write it george,  and not while at a public restroom either!)  This book deal that georgie got,  is the largest pay out for any book to be written in history.  Harper doesn't need to pay george 7 million big ones  (maybe 7,000,000.  No wait,  7,000 that's better.  O.K. 700.00 more like it.  $7.00 in the clearance bin at border's, now that's priceless!)  Do we really need to purchase a book about george and his troubled life as a closeted gay man who meets stranger's in a public restroom,  and who also does drugs here and there?  2009 is going to be  good year!  

Today is also my 2 week anniversary of my blogspot!  And I plan on sending Kathy Griffin my address every thursday,  until I receive at least a comment from her on here!  Wish me luck!  (I know Im going to need it,  especially when I have to post bail,  and make my 1 phone call.  The person I choose to call,  better answer the call,  and not have me go to voice mail or press 5 to send a fax (get rid of that option on your voice mail people!)  Until next time..................................

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

Updates like you wouldn't believe(no really, don't believe them!)

Well,  here it is tuesday,  yet again.  What with the writer's strike still going on in hollywood,  it seemed like there wasn't much hope for any new episodes of my favorite shows(way to go desperate housewives creator marc cherry!  Now I have to wait until next season to catch up on what I've missed.  I think you should send me to L.A. and let me tour the set of housewives,  maybe I could meet some of the cast.  That would make me feel better!) but then a familiar friend came streaming down from the t.v. skies,  American Idol is back!  Thank god!  I actually like Idol during the audition process they show for our amusement.  I knew I could sing before watching some of the "wannabe" idols,  but after I watched them try to imitate talent like Alicia Keys or Mariah (and failing miserably I want to ad,  just because I can!) now I KNOW I can sing better than dogs howling!  I read on line over the weekend,  that Paula Abdul is in talks to perform during the superbowl halftime show,  with Randy Jackson.  I love Paula,  but I think I'd rather see another "malfunction" with Janet again!  I mean,  what are her and randy going to sing "opposites attract"?  Can't wait to see Randy's dance moves(look out mc scat cat! That's the animated cat in Paula's video for the song,  in case those of you didn't know who he was.  Meow!)

So yesterday,  I stopped to get a latte before going to get my hair cut(which I may ad,  looks ab fab!) As I stood there waiting for miss barista of the year(not!) this women was waiting for her order in back of me.  She was dressed very nicely with a brown suit and a leopard scarf.  I happened to look down at her shoes(I love shoes!  I just don't spend the kind of money on shoes like Carrie on sex and the city.  I would If I had that kind of money!) and this well dressed woman was wearing a pair of leopard print tennis shoes to match her scarf(more like barf!) I am so tired of these women who wear matching shoe patterns with an outfit because they "think" it looks good.  WELL IT DOESN'T!  The poor animal who gave up his(or her) life for those hideous shoes would see where there last days of life and freedom had gone and say "Ooh My God!  My last life of breath went to a pair of awful looking shoes!  Im going to bitch slap the maker of those shoes,  and demand to return my fur to a child who needs it!"  Ladies,  don't wear a shoe pattern,  (that makes you look like a cow or a leopard) with a matching top or scarf or pants.  Your all lucky your not in africa or some jungle wearing that outfit!  You'd be mistaken for an actual animal,  and pummeled with arrows and heavy(and huge) rocks!

Finally,  The BIG news of the day (which I heard 45 minutes ago,  so you know its good and fresh,  not stale and outdated) is that Sweeney Todd is finally going to be here on friday!  I have been waiting a month to see Johnny as the barber shop of terror!  And now its here (well, it'll be here!)I haven't been this excited about anything since I don't know when (lie!)  Hope all is well with all my readers (all 3 of you!) and Look for another observation of life through my eyes soon (cheesy plug!)  Thursday we re-send the blog to Kathy!  Love ya Kathy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  

Sunday, January 13, 2008

Friday and saturday wrap-ups (hooray!)

Well,  the weekend is almost over yet again.  Where does the time go?  Friday was met with work and so was all day yesterday.  Friday night I had worked until 10:00 p.m. and I needed to go to the grocery store for some milk (no lie!).  I decided to go to Albertson's rather than Rosauers just to change it up a bit ( IM quite the rebel like that.  One time,  I ate raw chocolate chip cookie dough right out of the container!  And people tell me I don't have a wild side!).  We are now getting a brand new pizza bar,  olive bar,  and a tulley's coffee bar in albertson's where the movie rental space had been.  The coffee I will probably purchase from there,  but olives and pizza (have to pass on both thank you!).  I grabbed my milk and headed for the checkouts.  They don't offer the self check out lanes after 10:00 p.m. (probably for the purpose of drunk people trying to scan their beer and wine,  and not being able to figure out how to ring up their items!  Clean up on aisle 10!).  So I stood there in an actual check out with a live person.  The customer in front of me,  had his items on the counter,  and of course I looked to see what he was buying.  He was buying a reeses peanut butter cup 6 pack,  a large 32 ounce bottle of soda,  and some generic tobacco,  that you have to hand roll yourself.  As I stood there examining the items,  I though to myself  Wow,  party at this guy's house!  Count me in!  Its going to be so crazy what with the candy and soda and tobacco!  Somebody hold me back.  I don't know If I can contain the fun any longer!  I guess If that's the kind of fun he enjoys,  then you go BOI!

Last night after I had gotten home from work,  Mike and I decided to go get some dinner.  We wanted to find this great pizza place in Belgrade,  but became lost finding it.  So we stopped at the flying J truck stop (such a classy place),  and Mike went inside to see If anyone working knew where this pizza place was.  Mike came back to the car to tell me that the cashier told him that we should go to Columbo's pizza in bozeman,  and that she didn't know of any other pizza places in belgrade.  What a dumb ass!  I don't live in Belgrade,  but let's see there's pizza hut,  mackenzie river,  domino's,  rosa's pizza,  just to name a few!  We ended up at Old Chicago Pizza in bozeman,  where we were told by hostess girl that it would be a 30 minute wait (which only became 15 minutes,  thank you very much!)  The play off game was on,  and almost everyone inside the bar and restaurant was watching the game,  cheering for their favorite team.  One lady almost lost her pizza (literally),  when her team scored a touchdown!  Needless to say,  our dinner was good,  and we went home so I could get ready for my big night out to the hub lounge in belgrade(2nd week in a row!)

I went to the Hub Lounge with the usual co-workers.  This week actually was a little more fun than last saturday night.  It could've been from the 1 and a half margarita's I had drank.  One lady in the bar was wearing a "noel" santa hat in blue and white,  and was flashing the bar for free drinks (thank god she was wearing a bra!  O.K. who am I kidding,  even with the bra I wasn't expecting that!)  We stayed for almost 2 hours (too long),  and went home.  I lead such an exciting life (not!).  Well,  at least these adventures of mine make great blog material!  

Friday, January 11, 2008

The Party's over! (No cake!), but Kathy has my blog spot address!

Well,  the first week anniversary of my blog spot has come and gone.  I did send this address to my idol,  Kathy Griffin.  When I went on to check my messages this morning,  I saw 2 comments,  so naturally I assumed(Im an ass),  that one of them was from Kathy.  Not so much!  But Im not giving up on my Kathy(now THAT sounds stalky!  You know what I mean)Griffin comment.  Did columbus give up on finding the new world?  Does a mail person give up on delivering the mail?  I think NOT!  I did enter this contest on her website yesterday,  and it was free(minus the airfare and hotel,  Im on my own for those!  But its for Kathy!) She's giving away tickets to her sold out madison square garden concert in N.Y. on Jan 29th.  I just have to figure out how to get there and where to stay If I should win(yeah right!)  I hate to say this,  but moving on to other things(shock!  You mean this blog spot isn't always about Kathy?  Damn right!  Still love ya Kathy!)

So,  last night Mike and I went to see the hilarious movie "Juno".  We went to the campus square theater's just to change it up.  Every time we go see a movie at the hollywood theater,  the popcorn they sell there,  makes me sick to my stomach(pepto anyone?)  But the popcorn last night at campus square was just right(and cheaper).  The movie was so funny!  Although,  there were a couple of distractions in the theater(no,  that NEVER happens!)  First off this loud mouth (ho bag) sitting directly in back of me with her boyfriend or her one nighter,  who knows(or cares),  kept talking through the entire first hour of the movie!  I turned and gave her that "be quiet or I'll throw my flat root beer in your face" half turn look at her!  That didn't shut her up,  so I told mike that she was being too loud(I could hear her breathing,  which she shouldn't be doing during a movie!) and he turned ALL the way around and glared at her,  and she FINALLY shut up.  Now,  I have learned after going to see several movies,  to tune people out when they are being rude(beats a police record any day!) but this dumb bitch was driving me nuts!  Its like the time I went to see the movie "Titanic"  when I lived in butte.  First off,  I went with my ex partner(al),  who Had already seen the movie once before.  During the entire movie I had to listen to these 2 older(not 80,  but sounded like 80) women talking to themselves in their "outloud" voices,  debating on which movies they've seen the actress Kathy Bates in.  They kept disagreeing on what movie they saw her in.  Of course,  the movie they WERE thinking of was Misery,  But did I turn around and become rude,  and say "It was misery,  the same place IM in right now listening to this stupid conversation during a movie were all trying to watch!"  No,  I didn't.  But it gets even better!  My ex(al) decides to scare me during the part of titanic,  where they show the passengers who were dead floating in the water who didn't make it off the boat alive.  He sits there,  and grabs me by my arm and says "don't you feel like your apart of the movie right now,  don't you feel like your also one of the bodies floating on the water that are dead?"  I thought  (no,  but I wish you'd be quiet and shut up,  or your going to be joining the other passengers who didn't make it alive!)  But did I say that in my out loud voice,  NO!  back to last night.  O.K. the girl behind me finally shuts up.  But then this girl sitting in front of us, (more towards the far right of us) and her 2 other friends,  was texting on her phone the entire time.  I didn't notice it,  Mike did.  I only noticed she had her phone out,  when she dropped it in the theater,  and you could hear it hit the floor(I admit,  I did laugh on the inside,  like serves you right for bringing your phone into the movie and typing!) The point of all this that Im trying to make is this.  If you wanna talk out loud,  go to a rock concert!  Use your "whisper" voice during a movie.  And stop texting during a movie!  Is what your texting THAT important,  it can't wait for 90 minutes?  I think it is!  Unless your choking on a jujubee or a popcorn kernel,  and you can't talk,  so you send a text to a friend or family member telling them your in the theater gagging,  and you need to have an ambulance right away.  "Im in the movie Juno,  second theater from the lobby on the right,  third row down,  right side.  Im wearing a blue sweater,  and turning blue at this very moment!  Now hurry!  The movie?  Its hilarious!  No,  she couldn't come,  something came up.  Yes,  i did.  Now hurry!"  Stop texting in a movie!  Its just as bad as texting while DRIVING!

Finally,  I read in the paper this morning India's TATA(probably named after a woman's body parts,  cute guys!)motors unveiled a new car you car purchase for $2500.00(sweet!)  Only there's no A/C (o.k. that's not too bad),  no passenger side mirror,  (o.k. I can stick my head out the window to see who's coming,  no problem)  and finally,  no radio.  I don't think so!  Im not going to purchase a car(even though its brand new) for 2500.00,  and not have even a radio to listen to.  I suppose I could listen to my i-pod while driving(dorky).  It does get 50 m.p.g. though.  And the tires look like mini doughnuts you'd pass on at the bakery,  so new tires that are much bigger!  Maybe I'll buy one.  Maybe I won't.  But it was worth mentioning!    

Thursday, January 10, 2008

HAPPY 1 WEEK ANNIVERSARY!!!!! (O.K. I missed 2 days of blog writing, sue me! On second thought, don't!)

Hello everybody!  Yes,  I know I missed two days of blogging.  And yes,  I did say I was going to write a blog everyday.  Well,  when you've been as busy as I have been,  the once per day blog just isn't going to happen.  But look on the bright side,  I'll have more topics in my mind that I want to discuss,  if I only write say 3-5 days a week.  So what's been on my mind the last couple days?  Well I'll tell you!  

I went on to i-tunes on monday to purchase the new single from Janet(I haven't had a hit single or a hit c.d. since I can remember) Jackson.  Her new single "feedback",  is driving me nuts!  I love the song,  maybe a little too much.  I've listened to it non stop since I downloaded it.  Then last night,  I see that yahoo had the video for the new song,  so of course I had to watch it.  Its totally different from any of her other videos she's done.  First off,  she's wearing clothes that cover the "girls" I like to call them.  She's actually wearing a body type suit that's sleek and form fitting.  She looks awesome!  (Take notes britney,  you might learn a thing from miss Jackson.  Who am I kidding,  of course you won't!  Go pass out in a ditch somewhere.  But be careful!)  The video shows janet sitting on what looks like the earth or jupiter,  one of the rounder planets.  Then she drops down into a pool of milky water,  with her dancers who were hanging out on other planets with her,  waiting for her to jump into the milky water.  Once she lands on the milky water,  then she does her usual dance moves(seen them already,  get some new one's!) and then at the end of the video,  she's wearing a skin tight red body suit and she's twirling in the water and splashing and kicking the milk around.(What a waste of good milk that some poor cow worked hard on all day!)  O.K. now that I think about it,  the video wasn't that good.  The song is much better.  But she does look good,  I'll give her that.

The other song I downloaded,  which I've heard like a billion times on the radio is "clumsy" by Fergie.  I have skipped over that song since I bought it,  and feel that I or anyone who bought this single deserve a refund(Judge Judy we need you!)  Its like buyers remorse with this song.  You think your going to like it because you've heard it so many times on the radio,  but when you actually buy it,  its quite annoying.  I have 2 other fergie songs which I downloaded when her album first came out,  but after you hear them over and over again on the radio,  your sick of hearing them,  let alone wanting to listen to them on an i-pod.  I love fergie,  but I just can't seem to want or need to buy her c.d.'s.  Sorry sweetie,  Im sticking with my girls Madonna and Janet.  

So yesterday Mike and I had gone over to livingston for our usual lunch day with Rick and Jan.  When we got back to Bozeman,  we always take the east main street exit and drive downtown heading home.  We stopped on the corner of Main St. and North 7th St.  On the corner there is a thriftway gas station.  I look over while Mike and I are at the traffic light waiting to change,  and here's this girl at the gas station getting gas,  and washing her bumper with the squeegee that you use to wipe your windshields with.  EXCUSE ME!  Now,  I've used the squeegee on my windshields,  heck I've even used them on my front headlights,  but I've never stood there and washed my entire car with one while at a gas station.  I about died (well,  not really.  I would hope my death wasn't caused my a misuse of a squeegee,  but you never know.) I wanted to get out of the car,  and walk over to this girl and give her some money for a car wash down the road.  Im surprised she wasn't bathing with the squeegee herself!  Now I know where all the clean soapy water goes when I pull up to get gas,  and I go to wipe my windows down and there's always no water left.  This girl is going around town washing her car with every bucket of clean windshield water,  and then not telling the attendant she used it all!  She should save some water for those of us,  like myself who use those same squeegee's to wash,  I mean wipe our windows with.  

I will be sending an e-mail to my idol Miss Kathy Griffin today in honor of my first week as a blogger.  I hope she will read my blogs,  and see what a hilarious person I am (or bitchy,  take your pick!)  I will keep my bloggers(all 3) of you posted, as to whether or not she leaves me a comment on my blogspot(then I WOULD DIE,  but it would be a happy death!) You never know what can or will happen,  and that's why Im happy to tell you,  in my own way!  

Monday, January 7, 2008

Almost a week old(the blog, not me)!

Its hard to believe that my blog spot will a week old as of  this coming thursday.  I guess Im getting ahead of myself (as usual)!  Any excuse to eat cake is good enough for me!  As some of you may know,  I had gone to see my comedic idol Kathy Griffin in november at the paramount in Seattle.  It was my first time in Seattle,  and I loved it!  People have said to me that Seattle is too rainy and cold,  but I've always enjoyed the rain(except the "blame it on the rain" song by milli vanilli.  Blame your vocal coaches,  ooh wait you didn't have any!) Before I left for my trip to Seattle,  I had written Kathy an e-mail through her website.  I was hoping she would've read it before the big show,  and called me up on stage to wish me a happy birthday during her performance.  Well,  no such luck.  She did mention this creepy stalker guy(not me,  I don't stalk I only hope and pray to be in her presence.  There's a HUGE difference!) during her show.  She talked about how this stalker was loaded with money,  and would pay her if she were to meet him in person and go out with him on a date(among other things).  It was very funny!  Of course it was,  it was Kathy!  I have decided to send kathy my blog spot address on thursday.  I am hoping she'll read it and post a blog on here!  Who knows,  maybe she'll be so impressed with my funny wit and humor,  that she'll offer to be my mentor and I could be an intern of comedic learning with her while she's on the road!  Hooray!  Keep your fingers crossed kids!

So last night I watched the long and highly awaited last episode of Desperate Housewives,  until the writers strike is over.  Wow!  There were quite some surprises.  I won't give them away for those of you who are fans,  and who haven't seen the episode as of yet.  But now that the episode has come and gone,   its going to kill me to wait so long until it comes back on.  At least American Idol starts back up next wednesday.  Hooray!  And project runway is my new favorite show.  It has always been a favorite of mine,  but this season has been the best so far!  Did anyone watch last weeks episode?  The designer's had to make a garment out of material from the hershey's candy store from times square(apparently going to the ACTUAL factory was too long a road trip!)  One designer made a dress out of twizzler's.  It was hideous!  And the judges loved it.  Well, at least if you owned the dress and you got hungry,  you could snap off some of the licorice and go to town.  It would also make a great dress for a professional dancer of the night.  What qualifications do you have to have to be a "professional"  dancer?  Its not that hard,  Im sure!   Big hair and big shoes are 2 of the requirements I believe.  ho hum!

That's all's I got's for now peeps!  Only 3 more days until the 1 week anniversary!  For those of you who don't know what kind of cake I like,  well I like ALL kinds!  Love Ya Kathy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

Saturday, January 5, 2008

The day after jigsaw was at my house!! My night at the Hub lounge!

Im sure that all of you(actually only 2  people wrote me a response to my blog from yesterday!  Thanks)!  want to know what happened with jigsaw.  I went to where I thought jigsaw had be purchased,  (which was hastings and I was right)!  and walked in with jigsaw in a blue plastic bag.  When I got inside the store to the customer service counter,  there was a woman who was a teacher(not sure what grade or subject,  sorry.  We didn't really bond during our short time together)!  She had brought in some used books for credit.  It seemed like a L-O-N-G time with miss bookworm turning in all her books,  which I might ad all seemed to be stamped with a library sticker on most of the covers.  Talk about stealing our education from our children.  Well,  not my children I don't have any!  As soon as miss bookworm was done with her book fair,  the clerk asked me if he could help me.  I told him I had gotten jigsaw as a christmas gift,  and I wasn't sure whether or not he had been bought from hastings.  HE WAS!!!  Needless to say,  I got a gift card with store credit.  I told "JIG",  that's what I called him in the short time he was a house guest at my house,  I told him I would visit him whenever I could(lie) and left.

So,  last night I worked at the restaurant and then I went out with some coworkers to the hub lounge in belgrade.  Talk about a night of fun and excitement!  Me and one of my coworkers who IS legal drinking age,  rode with my other coworker who ISN'T 21 as of yet.  When we got to the hub,  we were supposed to meet 2 other coworkers of mine who had already been waiting for all 3 of us.  Miss under 21,  told me "you go in first,  and see if the others are already in there.  If their not,  well leave".  So,  being the decoy,  I walked in and they were all inside waiting for us.  Im so glad that I don't go out to the bars that often.  It seemed as though everyone in the hub knew each other pretty well.  Im not talking like "norm" on cheers kinda well!  It seemed like they all hang out at the hub a little too much!  Like its their second home away from home.  There was no one there even good looking both male or female.  There was a catfight that broke out between 2 of the females inside the bar.  What about I don't know,  but the one female barely had anymore teeth to spare inside her mouth if she was sucker punched. They weren't even throwing punches at each other,  more like slapping each other across the face.  Come on!  Where were the fists flying?  And not even a single hair pulling had happened.  I told the table of coworkers that I could have done a better job kicking some butt and Im even GAY!  I felt like I was watching a live performance of jerry springer,  but only not as violent as I am used to!  We went to the hub in the first place,  because my friend Jackie who I work with,  had met some guy from italy or california or an italian from california,  who knows!  She met him at the restaurant on thursday night when she was working(I was off that night).  She had heard that he was going to be at the hub last night,  and she wanted to get to know him better,  if you know what I mean! (wink!)  She even had left work early last night to go and purchase a new outfit and a new pair of shoes for this mystery man with no name.  She didn't find any pants,  but bought a pair of shoes that made her look taller.  MUCH TALLER!  We sat there for an hour and a half,  but it seemed like an eternity!  He didn't show up before we left to head back to bozeman (shock).  It was all and all a fairly fun evening,  but I could have stayed home and watched t.v. and fallen asleep on the couch and then  woken up at 4-5 a.m. realizing that I had fallen asleep!  Now THAT'S a good time!   Someone hand me a blankie and pillow.

Friday, January 4, 2008

Do You Want To Play A Game? Live In MY HOUSE!!!!!!

O.k. I had to share this with my bloggers who know me well enough to know that Im a fan of the saw movies.  I never said I was a huge fan of the movies.  I like them.  I've seen every one of them when a new installment has come to the theater.  I don't own any of the movies on dvd.  I don't go out and purchase the merchandise linked to the movies when I see it in the store.  So,  last night we had a christmas dinner/christmas present exchange with mike's family.  We had it last night and not on christmas,  because mike's brother ken and his sister in law maggie and the 3 boys had gone to minnesota for christmas to see family.    Well,  a couple weeks ago,  I had come home from work and mike was already in bed but was reading.  He told me that his younger brother pat and pat's wife beth had called mike,  to tell him that they had found me the perfect christmas gift for me.  As you can see in the photo which is attached to this blog,  It's perfect!  Its perfect for the shelf at the store from which it came from!  I don't want this jigsaw bobble head,  (did I mention its a bobble head doll) sitting in my livingroom, on a coffee table, or a shelf or a bookcase.  I took it out of the bag we had brought it home in to look at it,  and even the dog ran upstairs scared under the covers!  I could just see it now. The neighbors or passers by walking their dogs past our house seeing jigsaw,  and calling the police department saying that jigsaw DOES exist,  and that there are probably victims "playing"  his twisted mind game right now,  and you have to come to this address A.S.A.P. (all of this taking place when mike and I aren't home of course).  Then the "concerned"  neighbor would wait for the police to arrive,  so that the police know the call wasn't a prank call.   Then the neighbor who called,  would come into my home and take something for themselves they see and leave.  Then mike and I would come home,  and I would notice that someone had been in the house while we were gone,  and that  certain items were gone.  Then I would call the police,  and then they would come back to the house,  and explain to us,  that jigsaw was responsible for the earlier incident,  as well as the neighbor 3 houses away(no more good day's and how's it going to them,  that's for sure)!  And so,  the cycle of jigsaw's wrath would continue.  Which is why I must return him to where he belongs.  Luckily for me,  the price tag is still on the box,  so I have an idea as to where to send him home.  If Pat and Beth DO read this blog,  I apologize for the gift bashing.  I do like it,  but not enough to keep it!  Hope there's no hard feelings,  and next year at this time,  I'll give you a list of things I DO like or want.    O.K. moving on......

So,  yesterday I was at the bank making a deposit.  There were 2 people ahead of me being helped by the 2 tellers who were working.  No one was in front of me,  so naturally I was next in line to be waited on.  There is a rope in front of the teller line and a sign that reads "please wait here for next available teller".    The bank also has a walk up ATM machine,  and no one was using it.  It was just me,  standing on the "right" side of the rope and no one else was around waiting,  not even to use the ATM.  This customer walks up behind me to use the ATM.  Now mind you,  I wasn't even anywhere near the ATM.  I couldn't reach an envelope or a deposit slip,  from where I was standing waiting to be told "next"!   She walks up behind me and says "are you in line to use the ATM"?  And I politely said "NO". So then I got to thinking how stupid this question was.  I thought to myself,  do you see me standing directly in front of the ATM machine?  NO!  You could see tumble weeds rolling by my feet.  That's how many people were ahead of me waiting for an available teller!   Come on,  give me a break!  You ask a stupid question,  which you already know the answer to,  but yet you still ask it and in your "outloud" voice!    Use some common sense.  Like ooh I don't know,  saying "excuse me" to get to the ATM.  Or "could I just sneak by you"?  Why do people say that?  I see you standing there already!  You don't need to "sneak" by me!  Your not invisible.  These are the comments and my responses we'll be dealing with on my blog!  I figure,  If I can't say something nice,  I'll totally say it and say it "loud" on my blog!  *SNAP*!

Wednesday, January 2, 2008

january 2, 2008

O.k. here goes.  I never said that this space was going to be an easy one to fill.  But I think with what I witness on a day to day basis,  it shouldn't  be THAT hard!  Certain people,  and these are people who I don't know from adam,  just drive me nuts!  Take for example today.  Mike(my partner for those of you who don't know,  but should.  Come on people,  its been almost 3 years!)
Anyway,  Mike and I went to lunch and we were just about finished with our meal,  when this women and her daughter walked in and were sat at there table.  The mom knew the table close to mike and my table,  so she walked up to say hello to her friends.  This next part is what drove me nuts.  She walks up to her friends table,  and carries on her conversation loud enough that mike and I hear her every word and breath she took.  I wouldn't be surprised if they heard her up in space! She made a "what she thought was a funny comment to her friend joke,  but in reality,  wasn't funny moment".  Her friend told her that she looked good and was dressed very nice,  and so she responds and loudly I want to add yet again "Thanks,  I get my style from you!"  As I sat there listening to the comment that had been just made,  I thought to myself,  ( inside voice)  (well,  if your both basing your fashion sense on each other,  it shows.  You both look hideous!) Do you think that was a mean thought to think of,  even if it was my inside voice?  O.K. I did tell Mike the comment,  and he's the type of person who wants to laugh,  and you can tell he's starting to because his lip curls around his mouth.  he tries not to laugh,  and then doesn't say anything.  Then I have to say to him "you know it was a funny comment that I just made,  go ahead-LAUGH!!  Getting sidetracked again!  The point Im trying to make on this blog is,  sometimes other people don't wanna hear your conversation with other people you know.  There is such a thing as talking quieter!  Its like she was at a rock concert,  and we couldn't hear the band singing.  *shhhh!  I don't need to hear your dumb comments or your "what you think is funny" jokes.  Please talk lower!  the bears are in hibernation,  and they're trying to sleep!  

Tuesday, January 1, 2008

Happy New Year!!!!

With a new year,  comes goals that we all set for ourselves to achieve.  This was one of my goals,  to be able to voice my opinions about life's observations,  and to be able to write my comedy on a blog.  Hooray!  It has happened.  Just wanted all who know me,  to check out the website on a daily basis to see what hi-jinx and mayhem I feel has happened for that particular day.  Pass this site onto others,  and let's see how far I can go with making this and my comedy a career!